Dealing with Failure

by Arthur Pledger

This article comes right behind A No Shit Success Model:Follow or Fail for a reason. Inability to deal with and move past failures is a huge reason for perpetual (enduring) failure. On the way to greatness, you will make many mistakes and run into what some would call failure, but if you plan to continue moving towards the top of the success model, you will have to face some failures both on the front and back end. Its no secret that I have been the subject of some hardship and controversy in the past. But dwelling on past shortcomings is like sitting in a puddle of mud and complaining about being dirty. You must choose to move beyond your current circumstances.

Making your mark on the world is hard. If it were easy, everybody would do it. But it’s not. It takes patience, it takes commitment, and it comes with plenty of failure along the way. The real test is not whether you avoid this failure, because you won’t. It’s whether you let it harden or shame you into inaction, or whether you learn from it; whether you choose to persevere.-Barack Obama

The choice to either fail or succeed is made with every decision. Oftentimes, people will chose to fail or abandon their exploits for fear of failure or the guaranteed safety of “the way its always been”. They would rather stay in low paying jobs, read blogs like this about success, and see others around them succeed instead of doing what they know would get them better results. If that describes you, then you have one of two choices: utilize the knowledge and resources that are available to you here and in other places, take some risks and move forward or accept your mediocrity and abandon all exploits. You can choose to accept or reject your circumstances. But understand this: the moment you speak out and declare that you will acheive this or that, the universe will test your commitment to making that statement true with as many problems and adversities that it can conjure up.

Thoughts are Things!

This saying comes from the Napoleon Hill classic Think and Grow Rich, which is required reading for all members of this blogsite!

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.

Watch your words, for they become actions.

Watch your actions, for they become habits.

Watch your habits, for they become character.

Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

The way you talk to yourself and the scenes that you allow to flash across your mental screen influences how you deal with and overcome failure. Dont say I will be a success (future tense) because that will remain a “future” , unattained. Instead, mentally repeat to yourself  “I am a success” in present tense. At first, your conscious will reject what it perceives to be a lie. It may actually work against you (“How can you say youre a success when such and so“). But your subconsious is listening, and as you truly begin to internalize that statement your subconscious will start to adjust your outside reality to your inside reality, and your thoughts will become things.

If you are constantly replaying embarrassing moments, or failings, then you will be doomed to either repeat them, or you will sit still for fear of failing again. The good news is that you can make this work in your favor. By imagining yourself in moments of triumph, or by regularly envisioning your goals as if they were already achieved, your conscious and subconscious mind will both work towards seriously making that vision a reality. Envisioning success will motivate you to the point that you wont be able to sleep.

Dont measure your success by the achievements of others

You cant compare your success with that of another person, because no two personal situations or conditions are the same. Successful individuals have identified elements that are unique to their situation and have capitalized on them, and you must do the same. The best athletes, salespeople, entrepreneurs and so on, don’t compete with others as much as they compete with themselves. Besides, once you’re better than all your competitors, how can you continue to improve if your focus is simply about ‘beating the others.’You are in competition with only one person, yourself.

Changing How You See Failure

I have missed more than 9000 shots in my career. Ive lost almost 300 games.  26 times Ive been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. -Michael Jordan

Failing is human. The only thing wrong with failure is how you see it, and how you react to it. Had I allowed my incarceration (failure) to influence my goals and dreams, I would have never reached the heights that I have since my release. Failing can cripple your progress, or it can be a tool. What most people dont realize is that failing at something doesnt mean its the end of that venture, it simply means you had a lesson to learn. In basketball, losing a game doesnt end a player’s career, unless he doesnt learn from his repeated missed shots and opporunities. If you go to a job interview and arent hired, call them back to find out what you can do to make yourself more employable for the next company, and make the neccessary changes. If you failed at a business, analyze why you failed, change your strategy, and get back to work. This mind frame can be applied to weight gain, weight loss, business, hustle, negotiation, and spittin game to females.

1. Analyze and identify the causes of failure
2. Change your strategy based on new information or expert council
3. Implement a new strategy

Lets say youve been going to the gym trying to get your weight up. After two months you havent gained weight. A failure would give up (“I must not be meant to be big” “Why cant I gain wheight?! i give up!”). But youre no longer a perpetual failure (since you read my blogs). You take a look at your workout and eating habits and start doing research on bodybuilding.com, where you get diet and exersice tips that you use to change your strategy. You put together a new routine, go to the grocery store, get back in the gym, and start packing on muscle.

Learn from your mistakes and fail forward.